Driving Skills, or Lack Thereof

Warning: If you see my husband on the road, steer clear. He will hit you.

I happen to think I'm a pretty good driver. My husband? Not so much. A week after he got his new car, he ran into someone at a stoplight. There was major damage and he was without a car for a couple of weeks.

How does that happen? How do you run into someone a week after you get a new car?

Now, up until this point, he did not have the best driving record. He ran into another car in a parking lot while our baby was in the car. I think there were some other run-ins that I did not know about as well.

Oh yeah. And he runs out of gas. All. The. Time. Apparently, he does not believe it when the little gas light comes on on the dashboard or even when his car tells him 5 MILES TO EMPTY. Nope, must be a mistake. So I've had to bring him gas on several occasions. He says he just forgets to fill up the tank. What?

So as you can guess, I do not like for him to drive my car. I do not want my car to be wrecked. But one day he needed it, so I caved. I have a large, gas-guzzling SUV. He drove it for a few days. Then one night when he came home from work, he came to the front door and rang the doorbell. WTH? He normally parks in the garage. So I made a joke about why he didn't use the garage door. It was a bad joke that turned out to be true.

Yep, he wrecked my car. He ran into someone and was part of a four-car pileup. (He was car No. 3) It wasn't just wrecked. It was almost totaled. Extensive damage that would take two months to fix. He got an expensive ticket.

So now is the time when I pour on the advice. How is it that you keep running into people? You are an unsafe driver! What about taking a driving course? This is ridiculous! And it's MY car that is wrecked.

We finally got the car back and he again tells me that this time he's going to keep it for awhile and I can just use his. I don't mind driving his, but it's not mine, you know?

He had the car back two weeks. Guess what happened?

Yep. He ran into someone AGAIN. I feel like I am on one of those bad reality shows where they do something inappropriate to see how you will react.

This time he said he was at a stoplight. The light turned green. Everyone started to go. Then an ambulance came roaring by. Everybody stopped. Not my husband.

The scratch isn't that bad, but it's the point.

So I am warning you. If you see him on the road, steer clear. YOU WILL GET HIT.

He told me he needs one of those new cars that stops for you when you are about to have a wreck. Seriously?

I think I'm getting him driver's ed classes for Christmas.